I get it. No one likes to think about funeral arrangements or funeral planning. We are occupied with the business of living.
This was ever the more evident to me at a recent bar mitzvah I attended. We were celebrating an important life event, and it was amazing to see my nephew, whose father is Jewish and mother is Catholic, perform his duties during the ceremony and party like the best of them in the event afterwards. It was a moment to rejoice in the milestones of a young man's life and to celebrate his coming into his adulthood. A true moment of living.
During the party afterward, I was speaking with a relative of my husband about my book. I mentioned that it was recently published and that I was having a great time with the marketing, promotion, and publicity activities. "What's the title?" she asked.
When I answered, it was if the entire room became silent, or so it felt like it. She chuckled a bit and said something like I don't need that kind of book. Her comment surprised me a bit. All of us need this kind of book. All of us have to rely on others to carry out our wishes, to execute our funeral, with a plan or not.
Using The Ultimate To Do List When Your Loved One Dies: Before & After the Funeral as a tool to guide your discussions with your loved ones is not only good for you, but good for your loved ones as well. I am all for removing uncertainty and stress. We are all going to die. There. I've said it.
Preparedness happens for so many other of our life occassions. I reflect back on how much planning went into getting ready for my two children's birth or planning for my own wedding in Malaysia. Let's give funeral planning its due. Let's be the generation that elevates death to its rightful place.
Donna Vincent Roa, Author
The Ultimate To Do List When Your Loved One Dies: Before & After the Funeral